For you, the stars
by ace-fanfic-by-mel
Summary: One night started it all. One night, and Lance let loose his insecurities to the one person he was most scared to let see.


Lance had never really walked these corridors at night - or when everybody else was asleep at least, he supposed out here in space there wasn't exactly day or night. Well, whatever time it was, everybody was asleep right now. Everybody except Lance. This wasn't the first night he had spent awake, thinking back to Earth, of the family he loved and had left behind when they'd ended up coming here, however tonight was the first time he had decided to wander the castle. He always worried that somebody would see him, see his red face and puffed up eyes, and figure it all out. Figure out that he'd been crying, figure out how badly he had been coping without his medication, how badly he'd been coping to the sudden uprooting and separation from all the people he knew. From his family. He didn't want anybody to find out, least of all, Keith. How was he expected to impress a guy who knew that he spent most nights crying? Lance let out a small laugh, wiping his eyes with the back of his sleeve. He really was a mess, wasn't he? All he wanted was to go home and see his family one last time, even if afterwards he'd spend his whole life out here.

He'd never even got a chance to tell them how much he loved them.

Lance had no idea when he'd decided to make his way to the castle's bridge, but he stood there now, looking down at the seats and control panel that seemed to control not only the ship but his whole life now. He didn't especially like it here alone, it was unsettling. Yet at the same time, it was so peaceful… and so beautiful. He walked without thinking towards the window, towards the stars and planets outside. It was rare to have the chance to just admire the view, with everything going on. There was always some sort of incident, some place to protect, some place to attack, some ongoing attack… it was so hectic all the time.

Lance sat down on the floor, just staring out.

What _would_ happen? When Zarkon was defeated, when the universe was safe from the threat of the Galra again… what then? Would they just go back? Back to Earth and just leave all this behind? Would Voltron be some distant memory, a fantasy story that nobody would ever believe, something they'd dream about at night when sleep finally came? When all this was over, when they weren't needed anymore… what would happen?

Pidge had only joined the Garrison to find their brother. Once Pidge found Matt, would they continue there? And after all this, would Hunk continue too? Lance knew he would. After all he'd seen… he could never give it up completely. If he could, he would come back to space. He had to.

Lance barely knew Shiro, but he guessed he had his own family too, and after all the time he'd been missing, there was so much he'd be going back to. Shiro wouldn't have time to waste with trying to make Lance feel comfortable.

And Keith…

Who was to say Keith would even go back to Earth? He was part Galra after all, what if he decided he belong with them more? What if he went hunting for his family, his Galra family?

What if Lance never saw Keith again?

He dreaded the thought of never seeing that mullet again.

Lance didn't realise he'd started crying again until he saw the teardrops on the floor, perfect spheres of salt water sat on the tile. Lance wiped them away, before trying to stem the flow coming from his eyes, to no avail. He was a mess. He was a fucking mess.

The sound of the door opening behind him made him jump suddenly, hurriedly wiping the last of the tears from his face, but not turning to face the new presence in the room.

"Lance?" The door closed behind him. Lance internally groaned. Talk about bad timing.

"H-Hey Keith. What you doing up so late?" He just hoped that Keith couldn't hear the tremor in his voice. And he hoped Keith wouldn't come any closer and see his face.

"I… Well I could ask you the same thing."

"Well I asked you first." Lance crossed his arms defiantly.

"Well I asked second," came the boy's stubborn reply. Lance sighed.  
"I couldn't sleep…" he admitted quietly, pulling his legs into his chest and wrapping his arms around them tightly. He could hear Keith's footsteps as he approached. Damn it.

"Me neither. I thought… maybe looking at the stars could help." Keith sat beside Lance, neither of them looking to each other. An awkward silence between the two ensued.

It was Keith who finally broke it.

"It's surreal isn't it? It wasn't that long ago all this out here was just… a dream. Now… we're a part of all this."

Lance couldn't hide his face quick enough as Keith turned to look at him. The silence this time was less awkward… more terrifying for Lance.

"Have you been crying?" His tone was warm, and as Lance looked at him, at that perfect face, at the concern in his shimmering eyes, he felt compelled to tell the boy he felt so strongly for the truth.

"Please don't tell anyone," he whispered, his throat feeling tighter with each word.

Keith would probably just think he was being a wuss, that he was being a cry baby.

His eyes were full to bursting of tears again. He'd never cried in front of anyone before, or at least not since he was little; now his emotions were threatening to flood out through his eyes, like water through a burst dam - sudden and deadly.

A hand. A warm hand resting gently upon his own calmed him down instantly. Lance's tear-filled eyes met Keith's warm, concerned ones. They were so beautiful, those eyes, and so rare. Lance had never met anybody with purple eyes before he'd met Keith, they had been so otherworldly at first - and such a wondrous shade of purple too. A deep warm purple that drew him in from the second he'd seen them. Lance had fallen in love with those eyes first.

"If." Keith cleared his throat. "If you ever need it, I'm always here to talk. Alright?" Those lips looked so soft as the boy spoke. So soft - so kissable. Maybe Lance would kiss them. Kiss him. Kiss Keith.

But he wouldn't.

Instead he just nodded.

"I mean it. We're friends aren't we? We're a team. I'm always here for you Lance." Keith smiled slightly. He looked so beautiful when he smiled.

Of course he did. He always looked beautiful. Damn him and his beauty.

"Thanks Keith," Lance's voice was near silent, and he cleared his throat, suddenly very self-conscious of this.

"Any time Lance. Any time."

They never spoke about it, however it became a regular occurrence. They'd just sit on the floor together, watching the stars, sometimes talking, sometimes just sitting in silence.

Most of the time they'd hold hands, but sometimes they'd sit awkwardly five feet apart because 'they weren't gay'. Most nights, Lance's eyes were puffy and red, and Keith would try his best to awkwardly comfort him.

Keith was terrible at comforting, so in the end he just let Lance talk.

If Lance didn't feel like talking, they would be sat holding hands. Just holding hands, staring out into the neverending void of space.

If Lance did feel like talking, he'd talk about anything. He talked about his worries and fears, though he never mentioned his fear of never seeing Keith again. He talked about his family, his brothers and sisters, his parents and how his dad had never expected him to get into the Garrison as a pilot, and how proud they'd been when he had. He talked about his coming out to his family, how his youngest sister hadn't understood what bisexual was and how he'd had to explain it.

It was a month later that Lance had finally admitted to Keith about his mental illness, about how badly he had been coping without his antidepressants, about how hard it was for him going through each day without incident. That had been the first time Keith had hugged him. It had been the most awkward hug humanly, or Galraly, possible, but it had been a hug all the same. Lance's heart had fluttered when it had happened, with excitement and… something more.

Love, perhaps?

It wasn't much later, a week or so, that they were sat there again.

"I… I know they probably won't help much but I… did some like… research? And I found like the Altean version of antidepressants," Keith was holding a bottle of pills towards Lance. For a few moments, Lance was lost for words. He didn't even willingly move his body towards Keith, but was glad he had done it as he embraced him. The sudden movement had made his head spin a little, but he didn't care.

"Thank you…" For once the tears collecting in his eyes weren't of sadness. This was the nicest thing anybody had ever done for him… and it was the boy he had fallen head over heels for.

"It was the least I could do for you Lance." Keith responded, his voice sounding… different. Lance pulled away from the hug, a large smile on his face.

Maybe he was ill.

The world swooped again, but Lance decided it would be fine.

 **What was the worst that could happen from a little illness?**


End file.
